"Life Through My Eyes"

This is a story that has never been told.  Yeah, there are many books about it to diagnose it, label it.  But you have never heard this story from a person who lived it.  So I shall tell my story of living with Bipolar Disorder.  It is the kind of thing that is so difficult to express with words, but I’ll try.  I’ll try because I feel that people who live with this disorder have not had their experiences expressed in a way that serves them justice.

Now I won’t label this an autobiography, nonfiction or fiction.  Take from it what you will.  Then walk away.  Appreciate that you are one of the one’s who is able to do so.  But before you do so journey with me back to a time when I was invincible.  See the world through my eyes.  Welcome to my head.

I can’t sleep.  I close my eyes but these thoughts won’t stop in my head.  They move so fast that my tongue can’t manage to express them.  My hands can’t move fast enough to right them down. 

I know things that I did not know before.  I see the universe in a way that brings total clarity and peace of mind.  Yet the people around me aren’t awed by the wisdom I share.  I have so many thoughts that I can’t remember any of them.  Yet I know, I know that something is going on within me that will change me forever.

By Robin Mohilner 

April 11, 2001

During a Hypomanic Episode